Summer Letters
by M E Wofford
Summary: Sequel to my story "The night after the day..." How Tony and Ziva fare during the summer after the team is broken apart.
1. Chapter 1

This is in response to several people who asked me to write a sequel to "The night after the day…" Reading that story will help you to understand this one better, I hope!

I don't usually write sequels and so I apologize if this doesn't fit the bill. The main body of the story is a series of letters Tony and Ziva write to each other during the summer they're apart after the team is separated at the end of JUDGMENT DAY. There's a short chapter to open the story and then a longer chapter or two at the end of the letters.

I do not own NCIS or any part thereof.

SUMMER LETTERS

Tony found his way to his new berth on the U.S.S. Ronald Reagan after checking with the Senior Agent Afloat, Thomas Spencer. This job just gets frickin' better and better. Spencer seemed to be a by-the-book kind of guy who might or might not play fair but a couple of things he'd said had made Tony realize the guy thought of him as a probie even with 7 years of NCIS and another 5 years' experience as a cop. He came upon his cabin, opened the door. He had seen jail cells that were roomier. He did have his own private head, though, he found as he explored the entire room in less than 30 seconds.

He threw his bag in the corner near the small desk that occupied one wall and sat on the bunk, holding his head. He hoped Gibbs worked fast. He didn't know how long he could stand this.

He still felt responsible for everything that had happened. It was his fault that Jenny was dead and that the team was broken up. It was definitely his own damned fault Ziva had had that haunted look in her eyes the morning he left. Dammit. He slapped his own head. He had to stop wallowing in self pity. If Gibbs came up with something to bring down Vance and get them all back together again, or at least keep Ziva in the States, he had to be ready.

He stood up and left his quarters, headed down to the NCIS office. He was going to acquaint himself with every single file they had on board. He was going to be a damned good Agent Afloat. If it killed him.


	2. Chapter 2

THE LETTERS

One week after settling in on the U.S.S. Ronald Reagan,

Home Port San Diego, California.

Dear Ziva:

This is the first letter I've written since summer camp. I hope I haven't lost my touch. So far I hate it here. And I'm junior agent. Special Agent Spencer is older than Gibbs and as by the book as they come. He's already made it know that as far as he's concerned I'm a probie.

And to make it all worse, they show the same movie every night for a week. Can't tell the women sailors from the men sailors most of the time and my yeoman keeps making eyes at me, which would probably be good if I wasn't sure he was a guy (I've seen him in the men's room and NO I wasn't making size comparisons.)

Gibbs called and told me to hang on a little longer. He was working on something that would get us back. He sounded sad and tired. I know he misses Jenny.

I asked him if he'd heard from you and he said once or twice, that you were still at the Embassy.

I tried to call but your cell phone had been disconnected. I guess Vance made you turn it in. Bastard. Write and let me know your new number, okay? I feel like I need to talk to you. I still got the same phone. Guess since I'm still NCIS Vance didn't feel the need to take it.

I miss the gang. Do you know if Abby still has her mop puppets of us in the Lab? I miss her hugs even though I fear for my ribs every time. I miss chucking paper wads at McGeek. I miss Ducky's stories and Palmer's weirdness. I even miss getting head slapped sometimes. But most of all I miss you, Ziva.

Please let me know that you're okay. I know you said not to speak of what happened again but I worry about you and how you're doing. And I miss you. I miss your threats and your self confidence and your "I told you so" attitude. I miss your beautiful smile. Dammit, I just miss you.

Write me or call. No kidding.

Your partner

Tony

* * *

Two days after receiving Tony's first letter

Israeli Embassy Washington, D.C.

Dear Tony:

I was surprised to receive your letter at the Embassy but pleased. I'm sorry you're not enjoying your Agent Afloat status but expected it. It is like going cold bird from your movie addiction, yes? I too am bored. I am mainly doing paperwork and filing everyday. I have been told that I am now too soft and Americanized to be a true Mossad agent anymore. For some reason that did not upset me as much as I had thought it would.

I have had lunch with Abby and McGee once since you left. They are both working with Gibbs to get the team back together along with Ducky and "Black Lung." Why did you ever give Jimmy that name? They won't tell me anything about the plan though. All pretty quiet-quiet. They both say trust Gibbs. He will get it done. Of course, I trust Gibbs. But how long will it take?

I have been on American ships before, Tony. I know it is possible to tell girl sailors from boy sailors. You don't have to lie to me. You wouldn't be yourself if you didn't look and appreciate. You wouldn't be the Tony I know and miss.

I am doing fine. FINE. I cannot repeat that enough. Please do not mention that incident again. It is forgotten and forgiven, if forgiveness is even needed.

I have included my new cell phone number at the bottom of this note. Please call if you get a chance but in this Embassy please remember that even cell phones calls are monitored. Everything is monitored. I find it stressful.

And I liked getting an old fashioned letter from you. Holding the paper in my hand is a solid reminder of you that I treasure for I find I miss you; yes, even your movie quotes.

Take care, Tony. I hope to see you soon.

Your partner

Ziva

* * *

One month on the Reagan

Dear Ziva:

Finally some action! Three sailors had a side business going, bet you'll never guess what…prostitution. Yeah, 3 female sailors had set up shop in a little area at the rear of the laundry on the late shift. One got busted and dropped the dime on the others and when it all came down I was in the middle of a cat fight! That was fun but over too soon. We'd only been under way for a week but they'd already made several thousand dollars. Who says crime doesn't pay?

I was glad of the break in the monotony. It is slowly driving me insane. Ship board life is so not the DiNozzo way.

One good thing, I usually hit the gym 2-3 times a day. Bet my abs are harder than Gibbs' now! I find more exercise helps me sleep a little better. I also do a run around the ship every morning. I'll either be in great shape when I get back or dead of a heart attack.

Abby called me at least once a week until we deployed. She won't send me e-mails. Says Gibbs said not to. McGee agrees. He's called too. And Gibbs. It all makes me homesick. Now no calls. No e-mails and no letter from you for over a week.

I worry about you, Ziva. I know you say you're fine but you always say that even when you're hurting. I will only believe it when I can see you again for myself. Abby told me you looked like you'd lost weight. Of course, she also said it looked like Gibbs had lost weight too. Maybe she just has weight loss on the brain?

Write me soon, Ziva. I need some word from home. I need to know you're still there.

Love

Tony

P.S. It's "cold turkey" and "hush-hush." I miss correcting your idioms too.

* * *

Week 6 at the Embassy

Dear Tony:

I am sorry I haven't written. I was sent on a mission by Mossad. Nothing dangerous; just a delivery but I had to go to Italy. It is a beautiful country the place your ancestors come from. I'd like to go back someday when I can spend more time, maybe with a friend.

You broke up a prostitution ring on board? I bet that has made you the most popular man on board – No, I don't think so! Did you impress Special Agent Spencer with your investigative skills?

I've been doing more exercise too. Perhaps that is why Abby thinks I have lost weight. In fact, there was a bit of excitement the other day in my kickboxing class. My instructor had to go to the hospital. And I guess it was my fault. The paramedics told me they thought his jaw was broken. I didn't mean to hurt him. I have been "kicked" out of class. Maybe I can practice my kickboxing on your abs when you get back, yes?

When I went out to my car this morning Gibbs was waiting for me. He gave me a quick hug and told me the wait was almost over. He looks so tired, Tony. I wanted to buy him a cup of coffee but he said no, he had to go and he'd be in touch. Abby is to be the contact person for all of us.

I hope this comes about soon, Tony. I am tired of hiding away and not being able to live my life and see my friends. I really need an Abby hug. A McGee hug. A big Tony hug. Funny thing, I never used to like hugs. Now I crave them from certain people.

Tony, I am really doing as well as can be expected. I come to work every day and then go home and every night I watch the movies you loaned me on my tiny television and eat popcorn and go to bed early. I AM one incredibly boring person.

I can hardly wait to start being an investigator again.

I will write more often I promise. And you must keep writing too. I have kept all your letters. I put them in my safety deposit box. I told you I would treasure them!

Take very good care of yourself, Anthony DiNozzo. My partner must be ready to go back to work as soon as possible so I can go back to work, too!

Love

Ziva

P.S. I cannot believe you corrected my English in a letter. It only goes to show that being an intelligent ass can be done over long distances as well as in person.

* * *

Week 8 on the Reagan

Dear Ziva:

First off, NO you may not practice your kickboxing on my brand new, perfect 6-pack. Are you crazy, Ninja girl? I haven't been at sea so long I've lost my mind! Now if you want to practice on the gun range I'm all for it. I feel like I'm getting rusty. McGee might be able to out shoot me now and that would be bad.

I like it that you keep my letters in your safety deposit box. I keep yours in my gym bag. Since I haven't washed my gym clothes once since coming on board I figure a person would have to be pretty determined to rummage through there. Not that it's really smelly or anything.

Agent Spencer and I had dinner with the Captain last night. He's a pretty nice guy. Reminds me a little bit of Gibbs in that he's got the hard stare down pat. He asked me if I was happy and I straight out told him no but it had nothing to do with his ship really. He told me to come and talk to him so I have an appointment today at 0800 so I've got to hurry and finish this letter so I can post it on my way.

I haven't forgotten that we're going to have a long talk when I get back. Everyday I think about that talk. And you. I think about you a lot. I think I have a lot to talk to you about, Ziva. I just hope I don't screw it up.

Gotta go.

Much love,

Tony

P.S. That would be smart ass and it's one of my greatest gifts.

P.P.S You could never be boring.

* * *

Week 9 at the Embassy

Dearest Tony:

I think about you too. Every day. I remember that we are to have a serious talk when you get back but first I must have my big Tony hug before anything else. Or no talk, 6-Pack Man. HAH, I made up a new name for you. Just like you do for poor McGee.

Speaking of talking, what did the Captain say? Can you share with me? I am curious.

I also had a meeting, or dinner I should say, with Ducky. It was quite the delightful time and he told me that by the end of the summer you should be back at NCIS headquarters. I was so happy I gave him a big kiss. He blushed but I think he liked it. He is every inch the old-fashioned gentleman. He told me I looked tired and too thin. I did not think a woman could be too thin! I told him he was exaggerating. He just held my hand and told me to hang on a bit longer.

Oh, and Gibbs sent me a note, actually left it in my apartment on a stack of DVDs. Said to keep the faith.

I am, Tony. I hope you are too.

Oh, before I forget, Abby said she had made you some cookies and would be sending them to you. She hopes you like them. I hope they're not black cookies! And McGee put in the latest copy of GSM for you. I think he had already read it all the way through. They call it a care package. I put a little something in there for you too. I hope you like it.

Not much longer, partner.

Much love

Ziva

P.S. Yes, Smart ASS. That was what I was looking for.

* * *

Later on the same morning as Tony's meeting with the Captain of the Reagan.

Dear Ziva:

Just a note to let you know that something pretty wild happened at the meeting with the Captain. Seems he knows someone who knows Gibbs. And the fallout from it all is that I am escorting the 3 sailor hookers on their flight back to San Diego to hand them off for trial. Then I get 2 weeks leave effective the minute I sign them over. The only thing is - the chopper's leaving in an hour. I gotta pack up and get the prisoners on board.

I'll try to call you when I get back on dry land. The Captain hinted that I might be meeting up with Gibbs. It'll be the first time I've seen anyone on the team going on 2 months now.

Semper fi, Ziva. Maybe I'll be seeing you sooner than we thought. I sure as hell hope so. Don't send anymore letters until I talk to you.

Love you,

Tony

P.S. You know I am your favorite smart ass. Admit it.

* * *

3 months after the Director's death

Israeli Embassy, Washington D.C.

Dearest Tony:

I know you said not to write again but since you will never see this letter I think it will be okay. I just wanted to write some things down, to help me sort them out. I haven't heard anything from you or Gibbs since your last letter almost a month ago. I pray all is going well. I talked to Abby and she said Gibbs had contacted her and what ever was going to happen would be very soon now.

I have missed you so much this summer. I never quite realized how much a part of my life you had become. Not just you, of course, but the others too. They are my family now. You are my family. I love you all. But more than that - I am in love with you, Tony. I can finally tell you this in a letter you will never see.

And I wanted to tell you before you left that I was never mad at you for what happened. This is all very hard for me to say. Which, of course, is why I've never said it, I suppose. I have wanted yout to want me for the longest time, maybe since the first day I met you. Remember that day - I accused you of having phone sex? The look on your face was so funny. But it just never happened with us. We joked and had movie nights and shared our lives in so many other ways but never that way. I won't lie to you, it hurt. When you fell in love with Jeanne and didn't tell me for so long I was, I think, a little crazy. And then that ended so badly and you were in pain and wouldn't let me help you. I felt disconnected from you.

So when you came to my door the night the team was split up after Jenny's death, drunk and hurting, I thought maybe, finally, our time had come. But then it did not seem to be the time after all. And I pushed my feelings down again, thinking it was what it always was - friendship, nothing more. When you put your hands on me and kissed me I was shocked and I wasn't sure if it was me you wanted or just any woman. What is that saying, any port in a storm? And I knew I didn't want you that way. I wanted you to want me, Ziva David, not some faceless comfort in the night! But it happened how it happened and I thought to myself better this than nothing Ziva. Please remember this, Tony, if I had wanted to stop you badly enough I could have. Always remember that, ahuvi sheli. It was as much my fault as yours.

You were so shocked the next morning at what you had done, contrite and broken. You tore my heart in half, Tony. I knew then I should have stopped you. It is my fault you bear the guilt of thinking you deliberately hurt me. Now I think you could probably have borne the physical pain I might have inflicted better. Perhaps I was afraid that if I stopped you the chance to have even that much of you would never happen again? It is really my fault, you see? I have never been sure you ever wanted me or needed me. I felt lost and empty when you boarded the plane.

But your letters over the summer have given me courage and hope. I want to thank you for that. Even long distance you can always make me laugh, a gift from you to me, I hold in my heart.

I know I should not be so eager to be back on Gibbs' team. I should leave it all behind. But I cannot. I am a coward. I cannot bear the pain of not being near you, hearing you, smelling you, touching you. It is a necessity of my life. I will be your partner, Tony, and I will always, always have your back.

Here is the truth of it, Anthony DiNozzo. I love you. I have loved you for the longest time. I know I will never give you this letter, but I had to say it just once. To you. If only in a never to be read letter.

Ahuvi sheli - my dearest love, hurry home.

Ziva


	3. Chapter 3

15 Weeks 3 days after Jenny's death

NCIS bullpen, Washington, D.C.

Gibbs sat at his desk, a slight smile on his face. He could hear McGee typing away behind him. He could hear the sounds of the movers taking away the ugly brown couch Vance had had in his office. Now no longer his office. Gibbs' smile widened. A new temporary director would start on Monday, David Wright; a good man, Wright. But Gibbs hadn't waited for Wright to come on board. He'd gone straight to SecNav and gotten his team back. He was owed. Getting Vance out before he could destroy the reputation of NCIS was the key to the team reuniting and Gibbs used it on SecNav without mercy. He kind of thought the old man had liked it, liked the straight forward way Gibbs presented it. A salt-water sailor his whole professional life until 4 years ago, the Secretary of the Navy probably liked a little straight shooting now and then after all the lying, cheating and scheming that went on amongst the alphabet agencies.

The elevator dinged and Abby literally bounced into the room.

"Timmy!" she squealed and grabbed McGee around the neck, hugging him hard.

"You're back, you're back! I knew you'd be back! Gibbs did it! We did it!"

McGee's face was starting to turn red.

"Abs, he can't breathe," Gibbs said mildly.

"Oh," said Abby, and she loosened her grip.

"I'm happy to see you, too, Abby," said McGee, taking a couple of deep breaths. "But I just saw you yesterday at lunch. You knew I'd be here today."

"But now you're here, you're actually here! And Tony and Ziva should be here soon. Right, Gibbs? Tony's flying in today and Ziva gets to start back soon. Right, right! The gang will be back together again."

She danced around the room. She stopped at McGee again and forced him up and out of his chair and made him waltz around the room with her once before he could break free.

Gibbs was happy to see her being herself again. All summer, since Jenny's death, she'd been subdued and looked lost most of the time. She hid from Vance when she could. It had impaired her ability to do her work and had broken his heart all over again seeing her bright spirit dimmed. But now the old Abby looked to be back. Gibbs looked at McGee. He was grinning. McGee had actually not stopped grinning since Vance had turned in his resignation last week. Come to think of it, he hadn't either.

Abby plopped her butt down on his desk, slurping the last of her ever present Caf-Pow.

"So, Gibbs, when is Tony getting into town? Are we picking him up? When do he and Ziva start back to work?"

She couldn't sit still. She got up and paced around the room, waiting for his answer.

"Tony starts back tomorrow. It'll be sometime next week before Ziva can start. It takes a while to get that Mossad liaison position approved by all the required suits in both places. As for Tony getting into town, his plane was scheduled to land about 20 minutes ago."

She stopped and stared at him and then McGee.

"Aren't we going to meet him? Maybe take him and Ziva out and celebrate? C'mon Gibbs, he's probably wondering where we all are."

McGee came to stand by her. He looked confused.

"Yeah, boss, shouldn't we be there?"

Gibbs smiled.

"Nope. Ziva's picking him up. They'll meet us, Ducky, and Palmer for supper this evening. Abs, don't you have something to do? McGee?"

After a quick glance at each other, their voices blended together in a chorus of "yes boss" and "yes, Gibbs."

Abby left, McGee sat back at his desk and Gibbs got up to get a cup of coffee.

Walking back in the hot September sun he thought about the time he had spent with Tony in San Diego. DiNozzo certainly had done some growing up in the past year or so. Gibbs knew he would probably always blame himself for Jenny's death. But it was just as much his fault as Tony's. It's how they were both built. If you couldn't protect those you loved you had failed them, end of story. But they could both deal with it. They had to.

However, the problem of Ziva had been mostly what was on Tony's mind. He had talked about her - a lot. One night, when Gibbs had asked him why he was sticking to beer and not even so many of those, Tony had told him what had happened at Ziva's the night the team split up. Gibbs had been angry at Tony at first. Ziva had been nothing but loyal to Tony these 3 years and then for him to do that was so wrong. Gibbs could only imagine how Ziva had felt but he also knew enough about men and women and the things that happen between them to understand that Ziva, from what Tony said, had accepted Tony's grief and anger into her body, as so many women had before, and moved on.

He'd looked DiNozzo in the eyes and seen the pain there. He knew there'd always been something between Tony and Ziva but this was a particular pain he was familiar with. The pain that comes from hurting someone you cared for and who didn't deserve the hurt you'd dished out. So he'd told Tony a little bit about he and Jenny and their early relationship. How it had ended with her decision she wasn't ready for any kind of permanency. Had turned him down. About how rule 12 had come into being because of his reaction to this rejection. How the pain of losing her had affected his work and his personal life. How he'd felt like a bleeding wound had reopened when she'd come back into his life after all those years and yet how happy he'd been to have her around again. He didn't talk about how he felt about her death, though. He couldn't. Not yet. Not even to himself.

He told Tony he still thought rule 12 was a damned good rule. But if Tony and Ziva wanted to give being together a chance he wouldn't stand in the way as long as they kept it out of the office. He also told Tony he though Ziva loved him; had loved him since before he'd ever gone undercover and fallen for Jeanne. Tony looked stricken at the statement.

Gibbs had put his hand on Tony's shoulder and squeezed.

"She's a unique woman, Tony. You can't read her like you could the other women you've known in your life. She's a very special person. I would be unhappy to see her hurt again. If you're not serious, don't start anything."

He'd never forget the look in Tony's eyes then.

"Boss, I don't ever want to hurt her again. I…"

Gibbs kept up his steady stare.

"I think I may love her, too. I think I might have loved her from the first moment we met but I never let myself believe it before. Too many things stood in the way. She's a very, very special person; special to me. I feel it now being apart from her...it's like I'm empty inside."

Gibbs closed his eyes in remembered pain. He knew that feeling so well.

Tony continued, "It's made me realize so many things. We fight, we tease, we cover each other's backs, and I have missed her so much these last few months I thought I'd go crazy."

Gibbs nodded. Then totally out of character he'd given Tony a big hug.

"Good man," he said. "Good man," and slapped him on the back.

Walking back into the building with his cup of coffee in hand, Gibbs smiled again. He thought Jenny would approve if Tony and Ziva could manage to pull off what they'd never been able to. Ziva wasn't driven by ambition like Jenny had been and Tony wasn't as damaged as he had been. That emptiness left by Kelly and Shannon's deaths had never been filled , not even by Jenny. As he got on the elevator he thought Tony and Ziva just might make it. And even if they didn't, they'd be back here where they belonged, back in the family. As the door opened he thought of Jenny again, and always. Watch out for them, Jen, please, he prayed.


	4. Chapter 4

Same Day - Tony comes home

Dulles International Airport, Washington, D.C.

Of course, because he wanted to be first off the plane he wound up being last. Tony thought he might just start screaming and pulling his hair out in his frustration. He'd taken the commercial flight because it got him here sooner but now he wished he'd used a military transport. The exit then would have been fast, just him and the cargo. When he did finally get to the plane door and stepped out onto the causeway into the airport he breathed a sigh of relief. Thank God he'd been able to get off the plane with killing someone! He clutched his duffle bag in his hand and rushed through the crowds of people to the waiting area.

He stopped and looked around. He didn't see anyone he knew. Gibbs had told him Ziva would be there to pick him up. Where was she? She was always on time. He got a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. Was something wrong? Had she changed her mind about meeting him? He was reaching into his jeans pocket for his cell when he saw her.

She stood watching him, wearing her favorite dark green hoodie. Maybe he should buy her a new one, this one was looking a little rough. Her hair was down but held back from her face by some sort of silvery-colored headband. He couldn't read the look on her face. Ziva had a slight smile but her eyes, her eyes were sad or maybe frightened, he couldn't tell. And she looked tired, dark circles under her eyes. Abby had been right too, she'd lost weight. Her jeans were loose. He was going to have to plump her back up. He loved the way her jeans had fit her when he left.

She took a step toward him and then he was running toward her. He slid to a stop about a yard or so from her and dropped his bag.

"Hi, Ziva. Long time no see," he said.

"Hi, Tony," she said.

He took another step toward her as she stepped toward him. They wound up only inches from each other. He reached his hand out to touch her face and suddenly she was hugging him and he wrapped her up as tight as he could. Neither one of them said a word. Just held onto each other.

Tony smelled the subtle spicy scent she wore; he rubbed his face in her soft hair. He felt the warmth of her body pressed against him, how she fit against him. He had missed her so damned much.

"Ziva, I…" he said.

"Tony," she said. "Do not say anything, just hold me okay?"

So he did for what seemed like a long time and then he couldn't wait anymore and he tipped her head up and kissed her. She inhaled sharply and stiffen her body but then she relaxed and opened her mouth to him and the kiss was sweet, sweeter than he'd imagined it would be in all the times he'd imagined it over the past few months.

He was reminded suddenly that he hadn't had a woman in months and he was reacting to Ziva's warm, soft body in his arms. He tried to subtly move his bottom half away from her.

She broke the kiss.

"Tony, don't."

She moved her hands from his waist down lower to put them on the upper slopes of his butt and gently but firmly pulled him back toward her.

"Is that a gun in your pocket or are you happy to see me," she said and smiled.

Tony smiled back at her. Ziva with a Mae West quote. It was perfect.

Just then a couple of teenage boys walked by and Tony heard one of them say,

"Dude, get a room why don't cha?"

Ziva giggled. Tony gave her another quick hug and bent down to pick up his bag. He'd have to carry it in front of himself for a bit. When Ziva saw his maneuvering she giggled again.

"Come on, Tony. Let's go," she said.

She took his hand and led him out of building toward the parking garage. She led him to the elevator and once they got off on the right floor she handed the car keys to Tony.

He gave her a look, then glanced down at the keys.

"Hey, these are my keys!"

She nodded.

"Yes, they are. McGee and I rescued your car after you left. It's been parked in my apartment lot for the last few months. I drove it once a week to keep the battery charged. I hope you don't mind?"

"Mind? Ziva that, well, that was just damned nice. Thanks."

"You are welcome."

She led the way to his car. He opened the trunk and threw his bag in. Then he pushed the unlock button. He walked to the drivers' side and stopped.

"Uh, Ziva, there's two big dents in the side of the driver's door."

She gave him a considering look.

"Yes, there are, Tony. They were there when we picked up the car. McGee thought it looked like a size 12 foot had come into violent contact with the metal. I was forced to agree."

Tony had the grace to blush. He vaguely remembered abusing his car that last night before he left for San Diego. Now he was going to have to pay to get it straightened out. Damn.

He heard Ziva giggling again as she got into the Mustang.

He climbed in behind the wheel and started the car. Man, it felt good to be back. He looked over at Ziva.

"So where we going, Ziva? To the office? What's the plan?"

"The only plan I know of is that we meet Gibbs and the others for supper tonight at Ruth's Chris Steak House, Gibbs' treat, at 1900. It is up to you. It is your first day back."

He backed out of the parking place and smiled at her.

"I'll think of something."


	5. Chapter 5

Tony's apartment on the day of his arrival back in D.C.

Tony literally ran up the stairs and to his apartment. He slammed the door open and looked around. Everything seemed in place. His big screen TV. His DVD collection against both long walls in the living room. His books shelves. His furniture. HIS APARTMENT. Not some lousy 9 x 9 steel encased coffin on a stupid ship. HIS STUFF.

Ziva came into the door behind him and he grabbed her and hugged her.

"Ziva, I'm home. Here's all my stuff. And, hey, it's not even dusty."

He ran his finger across the screen of the TV and looked at the clean fingertip.

"I've been gone for months, Ziva. Can you tell me why there's no dust? I mean, when I knew I was being transferred to the Reagan I canceled my maid service."

Ziva began walking around the room. Pausing to look at some DVDs closely, picking up one or two and checking out the covers.

"Ziva?" Tony said.

She turned to face him, her hands behind her back and not looking at him.

"Well, Tony, I, well, Abby and I, we took turns coming once a week and dusting and opening the windows for a while. And checking to make sure everything was still okay.

Tony opened his mouth and then closed it. Then he had to look away from Ziva as he felt the hot sting of tears in his eyes. They had done that for him? Damn.

He felt her hand on his shoulder.

"Something wrong?" she asked.

He sniffed.

"No. Nothing. That was just really, really nice of you and Abby."

"You are most welcome."

Ziva smiled at him. He would never know that when it was her turn to clean, she would first go and stand in his closet, burying her head in his shirts and suits, breathing deeply of his scent, rubbing her face against the material. It became her favorite thing to do while he was gone. She had felt closer to him then.

"Go on," she said. "I know you want to check out the rest of the apartment. I'll sit here and give you a moment."

She sat down on his couch and picked up a GSM that lay on the table next to it.

He did as she suggested.

His bathroom was the same. His towels. His shower curtain. His soap. Hmm…he might have to make a trip to the store. He was running a little low on some things. He tried to remember what he had in his duffle.

He walked into the bedroom and smiled. Yes, it was still there. His king-sized bed with the pillow-top mattress and the cashmere bed cover. All his stuff where it belonged and he was back to enjoy it. He stepped to the closet and opened the door. Checked out his clothes, looked like everything was still there. He ran his hand along the clothes enjoying the feel. Suddenly he took a deep breath. He could swear he smelled Ziva's perfume in here. He leaned in closer to the clothes, definitely smelled like him but like Ziva too. Had she been dusting in his closet while he was gone?

He closed the door and stood in the center of his bedroom and just looked around. Well pleased. His eyes came back to the bed and for one startling second he had a vision of Ziva lying nude in the middle of the bed beckoning him to join her. No. That was a dream he wanted to pursue but first he had to do something else, something important.

He went back into where Ziva was quietly reading his magazine and sat down on the couch beside her. She put the magazine down and said, "Have you decided what you want to do?"

"Yes. I want to have that talk now."

Ziva felt her stomach clench. She didn't really want to talk. She wanted to watch movies or go for a drive but not talk. She was afraid of what he would say. But she made her head nod yes and looked at him steadily. It was one of the hardest things she had ever done.

Tony didn't know where to start. He reached over and took her hand in his, playing with her fingers, measuring them against his much larger ones.

"I've been thinking a lot over the past few months, Ziva. And one of the things I've thunk, wait is that a word?"

She shrugged.

"It doesn't matter. I've been thinking about you a lot, about us. About what happened, everything that happened; Jenny's death and the break up of the team and that…that last night before I left. I even talked about it some with Gibbs out there in San Diego."

Ziva's eyes got big. Had Tony told Gibbs everything that had happened that last night? She didn't understand why he would do that.

"He made me see things clearer, Ziva. The whole thing with him and Jenny, and how they just never could get it together even though they loved each other. I don't want that to happen to us, Ziva."

Ziva didn't quite understand.

"Tony, what are you trying to say?"

He entwined his fingers with hers and looked steadily in her eyes.

"I am trying to tell you I love you, Ziva. I may have loved you since that first day when you came in with that scarf in your hair and your 'provocative slouching.' You know you intimidated the heck out of me, right?"

She shook her head. No, she hadn't thought she'd intimidated him all that much. He'd always had a come back for her. And if he didn't have a comeback he'd used his considerable personal charm to distract her. But what was that he said about loving her?

"Gibbs made me realize something else too and I want to apologize for all the times I've hurt you in the past up to and including that night before I left. You didn't deserve any of it, Ziva. You were there for me and I wasn't always there for you. I am so sorry. I hope you can forgive me."

He heard her gasp. He looked at her. She had put her other hand up to her mouth. A single tear fell, rolling down her cheek.

"Ziva?" he asked.

She took a deep breath.

"Are you saying you love me, Tony?"

"Well, yeah. That's what I'm trying to say apparently not doing too good a job of it though. I knew I should've gone with the whole Jerry Maguire thing but I know it makes you cra…"

The rest of what he was going to say was cut off by Ziva capturing his mouth with hers. Pushing him back on the couch with her body. She pushed him all the way down.

Tony pushed back, forcing her up and off of him until he could see her face.

"Whoa, Crazy Ninja Chick. Does this mean what I think it means?"

"I hope so, Tony. I have loved you for so long and for you to say to me that you love me is, is…"

And then she started crying. Big tears just came out of those dark brown eyes but she didn't make a sound.

Tony hugged her to him again.

"Don't cry, honey. Please, don't cry."

He gently sat her up and off of him and stood.

"This time, Ziva, it's all about you."

He helped her stand and then gathered her up in his arms and carried her to his bed. He sat her down gently and then knelt and took off her boots. Then he took off her hoodie and her shirt and laid her back on his bed in her bra and cargo pants.

He lay down beside her and turned her face and kissed her. A long slow kiss that explored every part of her mouth. And when he was satisfied with that he moved down to her neck. Everything he did was slow and gentle. He watched her face. He noticed every single movement she made, alive to every nuance of her body. If she gave the least sign that she didn't like something he stopped. If he did something she liked he did it some more. He made love to her like he'd never made love to a woman before. No thought for his own pleasure but only hers. He treasured her, he cherished her, he loved every single inch of her. When he finally joined his body to hers there was magic in it for both of them.

Afterwards, he held her close to him, running his hand over the smooth softness of her skin. Enjoying having her in his bed next to him. He felt what? Peaceful? Was this how it felt to be at peace? Why the hell had he never told her before? But maybe he had to go through the other things first; Jeanne and Jenny and losing his team family before he could arrive at this point? He tightened his hold on her.

She kissed him. He kissed her back.

"I love you, Tony."

"The feeling is mutual," he said in a bad Romania accent.

She punched him in the chest.  
"What movie?" she demanded.

"_Young Frankenstein _Terry Garr to Gene Wilder on their honeymoon night."

"Oh," she said. "That is okay then."

And she giggled into his chest while he smiled the big true DiNozzo smile for her, the one she loved to see.

They snuggled and talked the afternoon away. He told her about being bored on the Reagan. She told him about how she had been just as bored doing clerical work at the Embassy. He told her how he had missed her. She told him he hadn't missed her nearly as much as she'd missed him. That necessitated a lot more kissing. He told her about the days with Gibbs. How Gibbs had helped him to see what he really wanted. Here he hugged her again. She told him how worried she was about Gibbs. How tired she thought he looked.

Tony agreed. Gibbs had looked tired and drained. Even more than when Kate had died.

"Maybe now that he's getting his team back he can sit down and really grieve for Jenny?" he said. "He's never had time to do that, he's been working on getting us back together."

"Maybe we can help him, yes?" Ziva said.

"Yes, Ziva. Maybe we can."

Tony's eyes were closing and he could feel Ziva relaxing against him. They both needed a nap, he thought, intertwining his legs with hers. He stretched out and sighed. Then he had a thought and his eyes popped open.

"Shit! Ziva, honey, what time are we supposed to meet the others?"

"Hmmm, 1900" she murmured sleepily.

He looked around to his bedside clock then stood up abruptly. He jerked the sheet off her, pausing for a second or two to admire the view.

"It's already 1800. We gotta get a move on or I'll be late for my first meeting back with the gang and McGee will never let me live it down."

He reached over and took her hand and pulled her up beside him and kissed her one more time.

"I am never going to get enough of kissing you, never."

She ground her body into his. He swatted her rump.

"Stop that. We gotta get ready."

She laughed and beat him into the shower.

They made it to the steakhouse only 20 minutes late. Tony let Ziva drive.

* * *

Since I wrote the original story this is the sequel to a song has been running through my head. And it basically led me to write Summer Letters. Most of you are going be way too young to remember this song by Bobby Vinton. Heck, most of your parents are probably too young to remember it. But it's one of the great teen laments…

By the way the lyrics "sealed with a kiss" have nothing to do with the episode SWAK.

SEALED WITH A KISS

So we gotta say goodbye for the summer

Baby, I promise you this

I'll send you all my love

Everyday in a letter

Sealed with a kiss.

Yes, it's gonna be a cold, lonely summer

But I feel the emptiness

I'll you all my dreams

Everyday in a letter

Sealed with a kiss.

I'll see you in the sunlight.

I'll hear your voice everywhere.

I'll run to tenderly hold you

But Baby you won't be there.

I don't want to say goodbye for the summer

Knowing the loneliness

So let us take a pledge to meet in September

And seal with it a kiss.


	6. Chapter 6

One year anniversary of Jenny's death

Gibbs' house

It had been Ziva's idea really. It seemed it was a Jewish tradition to have a memorial service not at the time of the burial but one year later, on the anniversary of the death. She had talked it over with Abby, who thought it could be like a wake and together they'd set it up. Gibbs wasn't too sure about it but together the two of them were an irresistible force.

Now he sat in a dining room chair dragged into his living room, looking at the people around him. Abby sat next to Ducky on the sofa, her animated features radiating pleasure as she remembered the Director coming to the lab sometimes just to talk to her. How real a person she'd been. You could tell Abby had liked Jenny and admired her. Ducky interrupted her to ask if anyone knew that Jenny had been a long-time fan of cricket? Everyone else in the room groaned and threw various pieces of paper goods at Ducky.

Gibbs smiled. They were all here tonight. Abby and Ducky of course. And McGee sat on the floor, leaning back against the couch near Abby, touching her legs with his shoulder. Always he was near Abby. Tim had turned into a fine agent. In fact, he could be senior field agent on any other team. Gibbs had offered to get him a transfer but had been turned down. McGee preferred to stay near Abby even though he wouldn't admit it. He had admitted to Gibbs, however, that he'd started writing down all the rifffs Tony made off his name. He was going to incorporate them into one of his books.

Jimmy Palmer sat in the love seat across from the couch, his arm draped around Michelle Lee. Like the others they had grown too. Ducky thought Jimmy would make an excellent ME someday, maybe even take his place at NCIS when he retired, which, of course, he did not intend to do for quite some time. Michelle was a rising star in the Legal Department, moving up the ladder fast. He wished them well.

Last of all he looked at Tony and Ziva. Tony too sat in a dining room chair and Ziva stood slightly behind him, her arm draped over his chest as she leaned on the chair. Even as Gibbs watched Tony took her hand and pressed a kiss on her wrist, then kept her hand, folding into his. She leaned closer and kissed him on the cheek.

So far. So good. They'd been together since he'd come back from the Reagan. They'd mostly kept it out of the office to his relief although there'd been that week when they had only communicated by using McGee as a go-between. He'd had to send them home with orders not to come back til they had worked it out. He had alo noticed an added ferocity in Ziva if something or someone threatened Tony. And Tony, Tony still flirted occasionally but anyone who had known the old Tony knew his heart wasn't in it. He mainly did it to make Ziva jealous.

They still played their little one-upsmanship games. Tony still tormented McGee and corrected Ziva's idiomatic mixups. Ziva would still make dire threats if someone got in her way. But on the whole life was good with them. He'd see Ziva looking at Tony sometimes and his heart would ache at the love he saw in her eyes. And sometimes he'd see Tony and he'd just be sitting at his desk, smiling at nothing. At moments like this Gibbs could see how good it was for them.

Often when that happened his thoughts would turn to Jenny and what might have been. Then he'd go home and open the bottle of bourbon he kept in the basement and work on his boat. In fact…he stood up quietly and left the room in the middle of one of Ducky's stories. He found his way to the basement steps and went down in the dark. He walked to his worktable and turn on the light. He emptied out the old coffee from the cup he used down here now, a 20-ounce cup, and poured it full of Maker's Mark. Taking the cup in his hand he walked over to the boat. He ran his fingers over the painted name gently – Jenny. He walked on around until he stood at the foot of the stairs again, remembering her smile, her hair, her way of cuddling up in a chair like a little girl. He lifted his cup "To you, Jenny. I miss you so much." And he drank.

He heard someone behind him.

"Ziva."

"Gibbs," she said and rested her head on his shoulder. "I miss her too."

"I know," he said.

He heard footsteps on the stairs and then felt rather than saw Tony come and stand right behind him. No one saying anything. Just being there for him. Both of them just being there with him and for him.

He sent a thought toward Jenny, "They're good, Jenny. They're making it work. I think you must have something to do with it. You must be their guardian angel."

He raised the cup again and took another drink. Then he turned and set the cup down on the counter. He put an arm around Ziva and a hand on Tony's shoulder and said, "Let's go back up before the others miss us."

They got up a couple of steps and he stopped. They stopped with him.

"Thanks," he said.

Ziva kissed him on the cheek and Tony said, "No problem, Boss."


End file.
